Okay, I haven't fallen off the face of the earth. I just have gotten to a point where writing daily, weekly, or even monthly, isn't a priority anymore. My Mom says it's because if I don't have anything positive to write, I don't want to write at all, and she's probably right. I don't exactly have bad news to share, but it seems less important to write when I'm just barely hanging in there with the program.
But, this is my "watchdog". And the less I write, the more I'm likely to screw up.
To recap the last few months... Let's see...
I had lost a total of 83 lbs way back in July '10. By September of last year, I had leveled out around 180-185. I stayed there for quite awhile, and didn't notice my pants getting the least bit tighter until sometime around February of '11. Bunna calls it our "hibernation" weight. We tend to hunker down in the winter, and there's a lot less activity. That includes getting out and driving in bad weather to the gym.
By the time I got back on the scale to check the damage, it was mid-April, and the scale read 196. Ugh. That was 23 lbs up from my absolute lowest, but more importantly, it was around 12-14 lbs above what I had come to feel was my happy weight. Being at 185 was 20 lbs more than I weighed in high school, but it was at that weight when people I work with and friends of mine all said, "Don't lose any more! This is your perfect weight!" But I let myself slide... I stopped counting my calories, and watching my starch intake. That's a big one for me. Carbs and starch. Bread became a regular fixture over the winter months, and my daily calorie intake jumped to about 1800 a day. Prior to that, I had all but cut out breads. I was getting my whole grain from bars and oatmeal.
So, needless to say, I'm having to buckle down again. It's a never-ending cycle, isn't it? But aside from the fact that my cute size 14 shorts are looking too short this year, I really don't feel as though I've slipped up that much. It's a setback, for sure, but it's not the end of the world.
I watch that tv program called "Ruby" about a woman who has been struggling with her weight her whole life. She started at somewhere in the mid-700's, and got down, (now in the 5th season?) to just over 300 lbs. She has done incredibly well, considering she has some serious emotional issues. Ruby can't even remember her childhood before age 13. We're at a point in the progression of the program where she is beginning to have some memories, with the help of a therapist.
But that's not my point here. My point is, Ruby had a setback. A 50 lb setback. But she got back on the horse, and is getting back on track. In the scheme of things, a 50 lb slip-up isn't that huge, considering where she started. And in my case, I can't let this 15-20 lbs make me crazy. In the scheme of things, it's just a small delay. Not exactly "two steps forward, one step back", but it is a step in the wrong direction. Guilty.
But I've got my mojo going, and I've been going to the gym at least 3 times a week. Back on my 1100 calorie limit. Summer's here, and I'm wearing mostly my 14s, but a couple of 16s are in the rotation. Funny, at this weight, I realize that that 15 lbs makes the difference in one size or the next. When I was at my biggest, all my clothes were of the stretch variety, and I never even noticed when my weight slowly crept up. I notice now! That's for sure! I'll be happy as a clam when my cute little 14 shorts fit cute again... and it won't be long. Summer's only just begun, and it won't take long at all to get this "hibernation" weight off!
Oh, and I bought a yoga dvd the other day. Tried it here at home for the first time. Seriously... this is work! I can see where I have really let the stretching fall by the wayside. What a difference some flexibility will make! Just another brick in the wall of my all-over body health! :-)
And ladies, thanks for being concerned. I am still here, even though I'm a little reclusive. I'll always jump on here and write when you least expect it! And if there anything serious I need to share, you'll read it here. I won't lie to you. I'll always shoot from the hip. Good or bad, you'll get it from the horse's mouth. :-)